


Oh Billy, what did you do?

by Aris2410



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Abusive Neil Hargrove, BUT AT FIRST, Billy Hargrove & Maxine "Max" Mayfield Have a Good Relationship, Billy Hargrove Being Less of an Asshole, Billy Hargrove Being an Asshole, Billy Hargrove Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Billy Hargrove Loves Steve Harrington, Billy Hargrove Needs Love, Billy Hargrove Needs a Hug, Billy Hargrove is sick, Billy Hargrove-centric, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Cold, Coughing, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Fever, Flu, Fluff, Gay Billy Hargrove, Kinktober 2019, Multi, Neil Hargrove Being an Asshole, Sick Character, Sickfic, Steve Harrington Being an Idiot, Violence, Vomiting, Whump, after season 2, and not seeing how much Billy loves him Jeeeez, fever talk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-08
Updated: 2020-01-10
Packaged: 2020-11-27 14:44:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20950109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aris2410/pseuds/Aris2410
Summary: Yeah, so Billy is sick. He's scared of Neil realizing that so he pretends that everything is okay until it's not. Some Max and Billy moments and later a lot of Harringrove! Set after season 2!





	1. You almost killed us!

**Author's Note:**

> So this was supposed to be a one-shot fluff sickfic but I decided that instead of only writing about the relationship between Max and Billy I'll also add some cute Harringrove fluff. So it'll come next chapter. I just need more sick gay Billy in denial.

-"Get in shitbird!"-Billy shouted from the car in the Arcade's parking lot. She was late, as always, he swears he will give her a lesson about it.  
-"I am coming, asshole!"- Max shouted back, running towards his Camaro. He was sitting inside the car, the window opened, his hand outside of it and a cigarette in his mouth. She came in an shoot the door behind her.  
-"Watch your attitude."-He hissed to her while throwing a half-burned cigarette outside and starting the engine with a roar.  
-"Where are you going? It is not a way home"-Max noticed after a moment of driving. She was trying to look frustrated, but she was scared. He was a dick, an unpredictable dick.  
-"I need to buy something. Do not fucking move or you will regret it. You hear me!?"- He answered her after a moment of being silent. They parked in the centre of the town, and leaving the music playing, he went to the pharmacy. "When Doves cry" playing at the full volume. Being in Billy's car alone was strange. He wouldn't usually let her stay. The car meant too much for him to leave someone inside on their own.  
Anyways, today, Billy felt too shitty to care. He woke up with the worst cold he's had in years. Billy couldn't stay home though because Neil would always say that being sick means weakness and he can't be weak and shit like this, and after a few moments of the "man talk" his dad would make him leave the house anyway. So it was better not to let anyone know he was off. It would pass in a few days but his dad knowing about it would just give him some extra bruises. As he walked through the front door of the pharmacy, he noticed a rather young pharmacist standing behind the cash register.  
-"Hello, how can I help you?"-The girl asked him, and he sent her his special smile. The one that made every girl in Hawkins melt to his knees. This girl was no exception. She quickly smiled back and bit her lower lip. Yeah, and that was pretty hilarious for Billy. Those stupid small town cows had no respect for themselves at all. But he could as well play along.  
-"And how can I help you?"-He gave her a slinky look, and she chuckled immediately. So fucking easy. He'll get laid at least. No cold medicine for him, though, it might reduce his chances.  
-"Okay, so what about today at 7? School parking lot? We can figure out a way.."-He licked his upper lip and looked the girl straight into the eyes.  
-"...to help you"-He finished, and she smiled.  
-"At 7"- She simply said and nodded in confirmation. She was blushing. Billy thought she wasn't even pretty but good enough for a one-night stand. It will be dark at 7 anyway.  
-"So is there anything you want to buy or..."- She asked nervously, biting her lower lip again. That was disgusting to Billy.  
-"Yeah.."-he leaned closer to her, still smiling.  
-"a pack of condoms."-he finished, now almost whispering to her ear.  
-"Which ones?"-she was blushing again.  
-"Choose your favourites"-this time he lowered his voice so that only she could hear him. This action resolved into another chuckle from the girl. She gave him a package after a short moment, he paid, smiled once again and left.  
As soon as he was out of the shop, he felt this irritating feeling in his throat. He tried to clear his throat but ended up coughing. Max was looking at him from the car. He managed to pull himself together and went confidently in the direction of his Camaro.  
-"What are you looking at?"-He snapped at Max, Jeezus she was so annoying. But instead of looking the other way, she kept staring at him.  
-"What did you buy?"  
\- "None of your fucking business. Now stare back!"-He was annoyed. He turned on the engine and drove away. Music playing louder and louder. This whole shit-town was awfull. He was speeding up. He knew he can't be late for dinner or he's father will make him regret it. And his small unsuccessful stop at the pharmacy made him 10 minutes later.  
-"Billy, slow down, please."-Max looked at him, almost begged him to drive slower. But he couldn't, he already felt the anger he'll be exposed to when they'll get home. Suddenly he started coughing again. It was like this since today's morning, but this one was more painful. The force of the cough made him bend over, and he lost control over the steering wheel. It was just a short moment, but they turned dangerously to the opposite side of the road. He quickly managed to get the control back. Still coughing he drove to the roadside and stopped the car.  
-"You could have killed us!!"-Maxine looked terrified, well they almost crashed he couldn't blame her. The cough was getting less and less powerful, and after a while of just staring into each other's eyes, he managed to normalize his breath.  
-"I am sorry."- He gasped, still catching his breath after the hurtful coughing fit.  
-"What?"-Max looked confused. And then she lifted her hand and touched his forehead.  
-"You're sick."  
-"No, I am not, you little shit."-He got angry again. He apologized but just because he could have killed her. There is no need to start this fucking "siblings" thing or shit. He didn't need anyone's concern. He didn't need pity. He was strong.  
-"Yes, you are. So that is why you went to the pharmacy!"- All he needed now was a little fucking Sherlock, of course.  
-"No, I went to the pharmacy to buy those"- He took out a package of condoms from the pocket of his black, leather jacket, and shook them in front of Max's face. Now, he was glad he bought them instead of the medicine he wanted in the first place.  
-"Yew, that's disgusting, Billy"-He only smirked, happy that he managed to take the topic to the other thing than his health. He started to drive again. Slower this time, they were already late. He knew exactly what it meant.


	2. Basketball?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A started the Harringrove moment. It will get better in the next chapter!

They arrived home at 5:10. Ten minutes later than they should have. Billy was already prepared. He thought that Max knew too. She was silent for the whole ride. He tried to look confident to make her less scared, it's not like Neil ever hit her. But it still must have been hard for her. It was for him when Neil was beating his mom, it's not like Max cared about him as much as he did about his mother. But still, it must have been hard to look at. Max was walking behind him, she never saw Neil really beating him up, but she was scared of the old men anyway.  
Billy walked through the front door. It was silent. Susan was already sitting at the table and eating, but his father was nowhere to be seen. It made his stomach twist nervously. Where was he? Suddenly someone grabbed him by the neck and pinned him to the wall.  
-"You're late"-his father hissed still holding him and pushing to keep Billy's body smashed on the wall.  
-"I'm sorry, sir"-Billy croaked, his mouth seemed dry. His father's eyes were cold and scary and looking straight into his blue eyes. The person who was standing in front of him wasn't a father. It was a monster with a bloodthirst expression on his face.  
-"Where is the respect we've talked about!"-He was shouting now, and pushing Billy harder with every word said out loud. Then there was a punch. Straight into his stomach. He was feeling sick since this morning, but that made him believe there is no avoiding vomiting today.  
He tried to pull a hand over his mouth to at least delay throwing up. But his father just caught his hand and punched him again. He couldn't hold it in anymore. He let the content of his stomach land on the floor. His father moved a little aside but was still holding him so that he couldn't really move.  
-"He's sick. Leave him alone"-He heard Maxine shouting. But Susan intervened quickly and dragged her to the other room. Thank God, he didn't want Neil to do the same to this annoying little shit. He could take it, to make them safe. He felt another punch. This time Neil hit him in the face.  
-"Sick? You're a fucking faggot, right? You do not respect Susan. She made dinner. You came late and vomited all over the floor. You are going to clean this mess up, and then we'll go to Susan, and you will apologize. Understood?! "-Neil hissed, empathizing every single word. Billy nodded in agreement, but his father wasn't satisfied with this response. Another punch landed on his stomach. He couldn't stand straight anymore, so he bent a little forward. Neil pulled his hair to straighten him up.  
-"I understand, sir"-Billy said quickly to avoid any farther beating. His father let go. And left him to clean up. So Billy did. Slowly, because every move was painful now. His head was pounding, and his stomach still hurt. After about fifteen minutes, he was done and went to the living room where the rest was waiting. Max's eyes were swollen so she must have been crying, Susan was sitting next to her, holding her hand, but her face didn't show any emotions. Neil, on the other hand, was sitting in an armchair, peacefully reading a book. He raised his sight from the book to Billy, and it was enough to remind Billy about the apologize he owned to Susan.  
-"Susan, I am really sorry about what happened."-He said hoarsely. All the stomach acid made his throat hurt much more, and it was painful to talk.  
-"It's okay, Billy. How are you feeling?"-She said, and edges of her lips disposed into something like a smile. She looked like she really cared. He missed it. His mother used to stroke his hair when he was sick. She used to read him stories in bed. She used to have the same look in her eyes. He felt touched by Susan's concern, but Neil would get mad. Not only at him but also at her. He didn't want that.  
-"I am okay, Susan, thank you"-He said coldly. His father immediately stood up and announced that they are going back to dinner. The smell of stomach acid was still detectable. Either way, none was pleased to eat. They all felt the heaviness of the previous action, but none talked about it. Neil was talking about his day at work and asked Max some questions about the school which she answered. After they finished eating Billy was thrilled to go to his room to finally rest. It's not like he had much time for that. He regretted making a date with this girl from the pharmacy as soon as his head touched the soft pillow. It was then that he realized how exhausted he really was. It was 6;30 now so he could still try to call the pharmacy to withhold this meeting, but it's not what Bily Hargrove does. What if they'll realize he is a perv, a fucking faggot. None here can know, or they'll have to move again. And none knows what shithole Neil will choose this time. He could have asked for some medicine they surely have some at home but if Neil will find out. He didn't even want to think about it. But his head hurt, and he couldn't even swallow normally or breath through his nose anymore. Fuck it. Billy silently dragged himself downstairs and started going through the content of the bathroom cabinet. Not a fucking pill that could help with a simple cold. Taking advantage of already being in a bathroom, Billy took some toilet paper to blow his nose. Disgusting. During the walk back to his room, he let a few coughs escape his mouth. He collapsed into his bed just to hear a knock on his door. Why couldn't he get even a second to himself? He opened a door and saw Maxine. Great.  
-"What do you want little shit?"-He tried to sound pissed off, but he was cut off by a coughing fit.  
-"My mom told me to give you this."- That was when he realized she was holding a cup with some weird liquid in it.  
-"You try to poison me now?"  
-"It a medicine, asshole. For your cold."- Now Max looked annoyed too. So they did have some medicine in this shit of the house. He took a cup from her and swallowed it at once. Then he handed her the cup back because apparently, she was still standing in front of his door.  
-"Can I help you?"-He asked, not getting why she was still there.  
-"How are you?"  
-"Why do you keep asking about it? I am fine."  
-"I saw what Neil..."  
-"Yeah, I know. But I'm fine, Max. End of story. And thanks for that"- He pointed to the now empty dish she was holding. She smiled and walked away. He closed the door behind her. He could blow off this date. He decided just not to show up. He was much too tired for that. He took off his jacket and just fell into the bed. He fell asleep. It was nice, he saw his mother. She was happy now, she had a new family. He didn't know whether this picture made him happy or sad. He missed her so much. He woke up to the sound of banging to his door.  
-"Wake up!"-It was Neil. And if Neil was standing in front of his door in the morning, he must have overslept. He quickly stood up, but it made him feel dizzy.  
-"I am up. Just a second"-He looked like shit. Didn't even have a strength to shower yesterday. He put his jacket back on and walked to the door.  
-"Take your sister to school."-It was a simple command, but from Neil's mouth, it sounded like a threat. It didn't only sound like it. It was a threat. Billy quickly went to his car. He really did oversleep. Max was already outside when she saw him, her eyes widened.  
-"What are you doing here?"- She asked him, and she sounded sincerely confused.  
-"Taking you to school deep-shit, come on."-he barked and was followed with a painful cough.  
They got into the car and started driving.  
-"Why are you up?"-Max asked after a while driving.  
-"What do you mean?"- But before she could answer, he sneezed into the crook of his arm.  
-"Fuck"-he hissed.  
-"I mean this. You are sick. You should have stayed home."  
-"So that's how it looks in a perfect little life of yours?"  
-"I turned off your alarm."  
-"Are you fucking with me?"  
-"I thought..."-she was interrupted by the outburst of Billy's anger.  
-"I don't fucking care what you thought. Don't ever do that again. Mind your own fucking business."-He yelled or at least tried to because, in the end, his voice was getting thinner and thinner and became too ragged to be terrifying.  
-"Fine"-she snapped, flipping her hands up. The rest of the ride was silent again. Billy dropped Max and went to his classes. It was hard for him to focus on anything. But he could manage to survive. The only hard moment was a basketball practise.  
-"You okay, Hargrove?"-Tommy asked after he witnessed one of Billy's coughing fits.  
-"Totally cool man."-Billy answered and went to the gym. Harrington was already there. Billy couldn't stop himself from staring at him. He was so determined in playing. His hair was bouncing a little with every and each move Harrington made. He had to force his eyes to look the other way. Steve Harrington was straight, and Billy was supposed to be the same. The practise started, and Billy knew it was going to be really difficult to survive it. He was nauseous, and he most certainly had a fever. And this cough. It was slowing him down, but he couldn't really catch a breath regularly today. But the practise carried on. He got some weird looks from other players from time to time, especially when he was coughing. A few moments before the end, the coach asked him to come with him. So yeah, he got this talk about "a need to rest when you're sick" and "taking better care of yourself." It took the coach long enough for the practice to end and everyone to leave. All Billy wanted was a quick shower and going home. But he didn't expect to find Steve Harrington still in a dressing room. What surprised him, even more, is that Steve Harrington was probably waiting there for him.  
-"What is it, pretty boy?"-Billy tried to sound confident, but his voice was weak, and an idea of being alone with Steve made him even more nauseous than he already was.  
-"Are you okay?"-Steve sounded almost shy, saying that, which Billy found adorable. He couldn't think like that, though.  
-"Never better"-Saying that Billy decided to just leave without taking a shower. It was getting way too hot here even though he was just shivering from cold. But Steve stood up and touched his hand. He immediately let go.  
-"You're hot."  
-"Thanks, never knew you liked bo..."-he tried to say, but he started coughing.  
-"No, I mean this. You're sick."  
-"Yeah, well good perception. Why do you even care, Harrington? I beat you up a month ago. You have amnesia or some shit?"-Billy felt uncomfortable. They were too close. He needed an escape, but he didn't want one.  
-"Yeah, about that. It's fine really"-Harrington just pinched his nose while saying that. Billy was aware that a few more seconds and he'll either kiss the other boy or punch him in his stupid perfect face. It must have been the fever. For sure. He felt dizzy. His head seemed so heavy, and his eyelids were closing. He leaned on the wall to avoid falling down. He closed his eyes for a moment to stop the world from spinning. He felt a cold hand on his forehead, and the feeling was so nice he didn't want it to stop.  
-"Jeezus! You are burning up!"-Steve's voice was too loud. But it made Billy open his eyes. He wanted this touch. So badly. So he didn't move, just looked the other boy into the eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so poor sick Billy. But just as Maya Hawkie said in one interview. "People survive" so let's hope Billy will even if only in this little world that fandom creates.


	3. Pretty boy, what are you doing to me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is just caring and Billy doesn't know why?! He'll find out soon enough and he won't be disappointed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Billy. Season 4 give us a doppelganger theory, please :(

Those soft pretty brown eyes of Steve Harrington were full of concern. Concern for what? Billy didn't get it. What Billy got was that he was no longer going to be able not to touch the other boy. He had to go.   
-"It's just a cold, Harrington."-Billy shrugged in an attempt to throw off the cooling hand from his forehead. He succeeded. Billy let the small cough leave his mouth and headed toward the door.   
-"Where do you think you're going, Hargrove?"-Steve apparently was not keen on letting Billy go. This pretty boy really didn't know what he was doing to Billy.   
-"None of your fucking business."- Billy snapped at Steve. He turned around to eye the older boy. And that was a mistake. His stomach still hurt from yesterdays beating. The dizziness he felt just a moment ago came back with extra force. His eyes widened, and he quickly moved to the toilet. He gaged, and the bile from his empty stomach ended up in the lavatory. Someone was holding his curls, not someone but Steve Harrington.   
-"Hey, easy there"-Steve was gently rubbing his back with the free hand.   
That was fucking embarrassing.   
-"Let..go!"-Billy gasped in a break between vomiting. He shouldn't be touched like this. It made him feel too pleased. It was so soothing. It was so lovely that Billy closed his eyes just for a moment. Someone was holding him, helping him stand.   
-"Let's go out, Hargrove"-Steve was helping him walk, and they managed to get to the older boy's car. The cold air made Billy more conscious of his surroundings. He was leaning on the door of the car. And his situation hit him hard. He was supposed to pick up Max after school. Neil was supposed to be on some shitty work meeting, so he probably didn't know yet. But if he'll find out, Billy will be fucked.   
-"I need to pick up Max"-he tried to walk to his own car, but Steve held his hand and prevented him from walking.  
-"Yeah, well no, that's not happening. I'll pick her up."- Billy thought that Steve looked cute worrying about him. Steve always looked cute. He could deliberate like that today, and later he'll just blame it on the fever.  
-"Okay"-Billy gave up fighting. He was way too tired for that. Another coughing fit struck him.   
-"What?!"  
-"Why so puzzled?"  
-"I just didn't expect you to say yes."  
-"Yeah, well I'm full of surprises."  
With that being said, they both got inside Harrington's car and drove to Max's school. She was standing outside alone. She looked pissed, but when she saw Billy coming in Steve's car instead of his blue Camaro, she speeded towards the car's door.   
-"What happened?"-she asked as soon as she opened the door next to Billy.   
-"He wasn't in a state of driving on his own."-Steve answered and touched his hair. Maybe some kind of nervous manner. Max didn't even spare a glare to the older boy. Her eyes were on her stepbrother. Billy felt something tight in his stomach. It wasn't a bad feeling, though.   
-"Hey! Don't look at me like that. I'm fine."  
-"Yeah, sure, asshole"-she said, but there was no usual bitterness in it. Billy would swear that he even saw her smile a little. They were driving in silence.   
-"Hey, Steve?"-Max broke the silence  
-"Yeah?"  
-"Can we go to your place?"  
-"What?!"-Billy and Steve said in unison. What did this little shit make up now?  
-"Neil's not home, today remember? And we could call my mom and..." She got wrapped up in this idea. But it was enough to make Billy mad. They can not end up in Steve's house. Not in this life.  
-"Shut up. We're going home you little shit."-He croaked. He couldn't even fucking shout at her. It pissed him off even more.  
-"It's not a bad idea. You don't even have your car, so you kind of can't get home."-Steve said. Now they both were smiling, and Billy tried his best not to punch them.  
-"Fuck you"- His stuffed nose and hoarse voice made him sound like a little child. Today there was no point in fighting, he'll fuck them up when he feels better. They arrived at Steve's house, and as soon as he saw this mansion, he understood why those little brats used to spend so much time there. It looked fancy as shit.   
-"Inside"-Steve said as he parked the car. Max started running toward the front door as if it was her house, and apparently, she knew where the spare keys were hidden because she quickly opened the door. Billy accompanied her with Steve.   
-"Make yourself at home, Billy"-Steve said when they were inside. It was the first time he called him Billy, called him by his name. It felt too intimate. No, it felt wrong. Billy stopped walking to the living room and just stared on the floor. How did all of this shit happen? What if Neil will find out? Fuck! What was he thinking?  
He simply turned back and started walking towards his house.   
-"Billy?! Hey, Billy where are you going?"- Maxine was shouting from behind. Billy couldn't answer her. He had to focus on walking. He had bruises all over his stomach, but it wasn't a problem he was strong. Just not strong enough for whatever Neil will do to him if he'll know he was with a boy again. Someone gripped his arm to stop him.   
-"What's wrong?"-It was Steve, but Billy couldn't manage to look him in the eyes. He looked past the older boy.  
-"Maxine!! Lets fucking go! "- He didn't know what to do. He was shouting. Billy was aware of consequences more than anything else in this world. And he knew that touching a boy was unrespectful, that he had to take Max with him to stay responsible. That was all that counted for him. Respect and responsibility. He could hear his father yelling at him, but he knew it was impossible, his father was not here with them. Suddenly Max arose in front of him, she was fucking standing much farther a moment ago. She was holding his arm and shaking him gently. What the fuck?  
-"Get inside, Billy"- She said. But it wasn't mean, she was almost whispering.   
-"No, Max, he'll fucking know, okay?"  
-"He is not home today. He won't!"-Her voice was loud again. Harrington was just staring at them, not really knowing what to say or not wanting to interrupt them. Billy started coughing. It was chesty and must have sounded bad because Max stopped talking and just held him in an attempt to stabilize him.  
-"Hargrove that's it. You are coming back inside on your own, or I'm dragging you."-Steve's eyes were cold. He really meant what he said. Did Billy ended up in some psych ward or shit like this? How the hell did it all end up in this fucking situation? But he went back and sat down on the sofa. Jeezus, Max and Steve were standing in front of him and just staring.  
-"Okay, so what the fuck, Billy?"-Max burst.  
-"Watch your mouth, shitbird!"-He felt like a stupid child who was getting yelled by his parents. His nose was itchy, and his throat hurt, and he just wanted them both to disappear so that he could sleep this shit of sickness off. Max started asking him so many fucking questions that he has stopped listening, closed his eyes and leaned his head on the sofa. When he opened his eyes, Harrington was sitting next to him on the couch.  
-"Open up"- he commanded. And then Billy realized that he was holding something in his hand, a thermometer.   
-"Come on, Hargrove. Open up."-So Billy glowered at Steve but opened his mouth. The older boy quickly slipped the thermometer into it. They waited, and Steve checked the device.   
-"103."-He read out loud. Yeah, so that would explain why Billy felt this bad.   
-"Do you want to watch a movie?"-Max said, so casually that it made Billy confused, and then to make it even worse, she took a blanket from the armchair and dropped it on him.  
-"I am in. I'll choose something"-Steve stated and went to the glass cabinet near a TV. Where Billy suspected he kept all his movies.  
-"What the fuck is wrong with you two?"-They both turned when Billy said it. But really? Why were they taking fucking care of him? And from all people, Harrington had to be so kind to him.   
-"Is it so hard to believe people actually do care about you, man?"-Steve said and carried on to choosing a video. Yeah fuck it, Billy thought. He buried himself under the blanket he got from Max and decided to rest for a moment.   
He saw his mother again. She was holding his hand.   
-"I miss you Billy"-her voice seemed so far away even though she was just next to him. She started becoming blurry.   
-"Stay"-Billy sobbed, but she was already gone.  
He woke up, and it was already dark. The TV was playing. He felt a body on himself. Firstly he assumed it was Max, but this "thing" was too heavy to be a little girl. So it must have been ..Harrington, right?  
He fidgeted nervously and, Steve moved. His head was buried in Billy's stomach and one of his hands on Billy's back. Harrington's fluffy hair moved, and it tickled his nose. Billy sneezed to the side, the sudden movement woke the older boy up. He lifted his head and smiled at Billy.  
-"You're awake"-Steve stated. He was awake but didn't let go of Billy's back.   
-"Yeah"-Billy's voice was almost gone, so he cleared his throat. Steve's hair was a mess, but he looked so intimately because of that. He couldn't hold on anymore. He wanted this boy so badly.


	4. We all have demons, right?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, some relationship progress!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry it took me this long to write another chapter. I had so much studying to do and I wrote this in parts. I hope it's not really bad. Try to enjoy!

-"How do you feel?"- The concern in Steve's voice was hearable, but to Billy's surprise, it didn't piss him off. It was a nice feeling, a warm feeling, located somewhere in his stomach. So Billy gave the boy a smile, a wide one that almost reached his ears.   
-"Never better, Pretty boy."- That was what he usually used to call Steve, but this time there was no teasing in it. Steve was pretty, and Billy was fucking tired of not being able to tell him that. Not in a real way at least. Steve Harrington was beautiful, and Billy was painfully aware of the fact that the way he saw the older boy won't change with the fever gone. That was the exact moment when he realized that Steve was looking at him all this time, and he indued him with the smile as wide as Billy's. If it weren't so fucking dark, he would be noticeably blushing, in those circumstances though he could do it freely. Those chocolate eyes of Steve Harrington were looking through his soul. The silence wasn't uncomfortable at all, it was soothing; it meant more than any words said out loud. Steve reached his forehead.  
-"You still seem to be running a high fever. Do you need anything, Billy?"-The older boy asked.  
-"Well, just like could you...." could you stay with me, Steve?.   
But Billy couldn't say that, and Steve was already standing up. He looked at the younger boy transparently waiting for him to finish the request. But he couldn't bring himself to do this. Steve was walking away, and even though Billy knew he meant well, there was still this feeling deep inside him, he felt rejected. A pretty boy like Steve wouldn't spare a second glance on him.   
-"Billy?"- The older boy interrupted Billy's thoughts.  
-"I am goo..."- Before he could finish the sentence, he started coughing, and it was painful. He put a hand on his throat, hoping it would in some magical way ease the pain. But it didn't, and he had to bend over, and the coughing was exhausting, and he was just so sick of everything.  
-"Maybe I'll go to the pharmacy to buy some cough medicine, will you be okay to stay here for like half an hour?"-Steve asked, and he sounded concerned again. It pissed Billy off this time. Why was he acting this way? Playing with his heart. But it was just the way Steve was, right? King Steve, with his beautiful hair, and chocolate, puppy eyes, and so much warmth that he could heat everyone up with just one smile. King Steve who chose weird children over popularity and being kind to Billy instead of acting like an asshole. Billy could feel his eyes shutting while he was looking at Steve. He just needed to sleep. He felt someone's hand on his face again. When he opened his eyes only to have a glance, he saw that Steve was sitting next to him. He put his arm under Billy's back and let him lean onto his stomach. Billy realized that Steve Harrington smells fantastic, and with that thought, he fell back to sleep. He usually dreamt about his mother, but this time he saw a monster. Neil was standing in the shadow, giving him this wild look. He was apparently holding something, but it was too dark to ascertain what it was. Then he heard this laugh that usually accompanies his drunk dad before he puts his fists on Billy. Neil started emerging from the shadow, and that's when Billy saw him. His father was holding unconscious Steve Harrington with a bloody face and frail body.   
-"No! No! No, you fucker!"-Billy yelled. His dad knew what happened. Neil knew, and he retaliated. He killed the only precious person in Billy's life. He killed his fucking sun. The one that prevented him from freezing to death. He fucking killed Steve.   
He woke up coughing again, and Steve was nowhere to be seen. He stood up quickly and started yelling the older boy's name. What if Neil really found out? What if he got him and now, fuck Billy couldn't even think about, now Steve was dead, because of Billy. But then the front doors opened, and Steve came in. As soon as he saw Billy, he dropped the bag he was holding in his hand and came to him.   
-"Where were you?"- Billy asked. His heart was pounding like crazy, his eyes were wide opened, and his look was awake despite the fact he just woke up.   
-"Calm down, I told you I am going to the pharmacy. What happened?"-Steve looked surprised, but his eyes were also gentle. That is when Billy realized he is all sticky and his clothes are damp and his hair is probably a total mess. And Steve is looking at him, and he'll think he is disgusting. Also, Steve is alive, and Billy is an idiot.  
-"I am sorry I just...I had a bad dream."- Billy wanted to make himself somehow look less crazy, but when the words escaped his mouth, he realized he sounded like a pussy. Steve started to walk closer and opened his mouth to say something, but Billy interrupted him.  
-"Can I use a shower, man?"-Billy said quickly, avoiding Steve's eyes.  
-"Yeah, like sure man, the bathroom is upstairs. I'll bring you a towel in a minute."- The older boy stated, but the previous gentleness in his eyes disappeared. Billy felt the coldness in Steve's voice puncturing his heart. He came back with the towel and just gave it to the other boy. No smile, no words, nothing. Billy reached the bathroom as quickly as he could. He jumped into the shower and even though he put on the warmest water, he felt chilly. He might have hurried up if he wasn't scared of facing Steve again. Someone knocked at the door after about 10 minutes.   
-"Are you okay?"- A familiar voice asked. Instead of just shouting back, Billy came out of the shower and wrapped himself with a towel. When he opened the door, Steve was standing there. Billy's hair was dripping, and there were water drops all over his body. He looked fucking sexy, even when he was sick, his muscles looked the same. And for the first time, Harrington seemed to notice younger boy's attractiveness.. He eyed Billy up and down.   
-"See something you like?"-Billy smirked and moved closer to Steve.  
-"I...I"-Harrington stuttered, and it was fucking adorable. So fucking adorable, he couldn't resist anymore. Billy leaned closer, and as the other boy didn't back off, he decided it's now or never. He pressed his lips on Steve's. It was a soft kiss. As soon as he felt Steve's lips, he reassured himself that everything is just perfect about that boy.  
His hand got wrapped up in this perfect hair, and they were kissing for a moment, and then Billy broke it. He looked the older boy straight in the eyes. But Steve seemed happy. It surprised Billy a fucking lot. He was prepared for rejection, even a beating but not happiness.   
-"What the fuck?"-Billy asked, astonished.  
-"You are the one that kissed me, Hargrove."  
-"Yeah, I'm..shit, I'm sorry...I"  
-"No, just are you... are you gay?"- Steve interrupted him with this look in his eyes that meant he was lost.  
-"No, just happened to like randomly kissing guys, idiot. Of course, I'm fucking gay, Harrington."- Shit, he was screwed. He started yelling.  
-"And don't fucking tell anyone about or.."- That's all he managed to say before he was interrupted with Steve's lips. It felt like the world stopped. Steve Harrington was kissing him, with his own will. He felt like on drugs, but it was better. It was warm and safe. And he was so fucking in love with a stupid boy, he couldn't believe it himself. His tongue slipped into the other boy's mouth. And it seemed like they fit together. Steve was doing magic with his tongue. Getting deeper and deeper. They were thirsty for each other. Then Billy suddenly broke away from the kiss to fucking cough. He had to hold his towel so it won't slip away. Steve wrapped his arm around Billy's back and helped him sit down.  
-"Put some clothes on. Shit, I should have told you to do so sooner."  
-"Pretty boy..... trus....trust me you shouldn't have."- Billy was still fighting the coughing fit, but in the end, he looked up to meet Steve's eyes. The other boy just smiled and helped him get dressed. When Billy was back into his clothes, he realized the sunbeams were shining through the window.   
-"Where is Max?"- He asked. They should head home to change and then go to school so that Neil won't realize their little sleepover.  
-"She is sleeping in a guest room."  
-"Okay, yeah, sure, a quest room you say, amigo?"-Billy teased him. Of course there was a guest room. Steve, again looked like he had no idea what was actually going on. Bily started collecting his stuff (there wasn't much to collect though).  
-"Maaax!"-Billy tried to shout, but his throat was a way too sore for that. He felt a hand on his shoulder.   
-"I'll go wake her up. Just... just don't, or you'll make yourself more sick, man."-Steve said and walked away. Billy surely still felt like shit. Suddenly it hit him. They've kissed. What does it mean? Was it just like on night fucking kiss for Harrington? Maybe he didn't even like boys? Maybe it was all just an experiment for him. Billy started to get nervous. How should they talk now? Was his usual teasing okay now? Fuck Fuck Fuuuuck! He heard some noises from the direction where Steve previously went. And then, the Pretty Boy was back.  
-"I'll drive her. Go and lay down, Billy"-He simply said and smiled to him. Oh how much Billy would appreciate staying here. With Steve, resting. But no fucking way. His life truly sucked.   
-"I can't, amigo. Neil can't know about this whole situation. And Suzan's not my ma, so the school would have to inform him and we do not fucking want this to happen."- He tried to stifle a cough after speaking, but it hurt so much, and his breath was wheezing.  
-"Here, take it"-Steve handed him a bottle of what appeared to be a coughing medicine.   
-"Thanks, man. Could we like...talk about, you know the thing there in the bathroom? Fuck, you know what I mean, Harrington "-Billy was so not used to being so awkward. It's just that his stomach felt... funny? And he felt hot.  
-"I am not gay."-Steve said, looking Billy in the eyes. And shit, his heart sunk to those words, but what was he thinking?  
-"No, listen, Hargrove. I'm not gay, but I like you, okay? And this kiss it was. I liked it okay?"-Billy could swear that Steve blushed saying that. And, well Billy blushed hearing that. He looked at those sweet lips of Steve Harrington. And they seemed right. He needed them, and Steve seemed to know what Billy was thinking. He moved closer to Billy's face and...  
-"What are you two doing?"- Yeah, that was the moment Max chose to appear out of fucking nowhere. Steve jumped back as if someone electrocuted him. She didn't seem to pay much attention; she went to the kitchen and came back with an apple stuck in her mouth.   
-"What are you a pig now? "-Billy teased her. And started walking towards the front door. He coughed a little which brought him concerned looks from both- Steve and Max.   
-"I'm fine, come on shithead"- Max passed by him and outran him to the car. Billy just looked back at Steve and smiled. The older boy followed him out and they all went to his car. When they arrived at school Bily went to his Camaro. He still had to go home to get some stuff. Accompanied by Max he started driving. The atmosphere between them was good for the first time in a long time. The radio was playing and Max was talking about some assignment she has to hand in next week. Except for some coughs that escaped Billy's mouth, everything seemed fine. And then when they were about to park in front of the house he saw Neil's car on the driveway. He knew. They both looked at each other's eyes, petrified. For Billy everything went quiet. It was just him and the danger he was about to face in a moment.


	5. Dying is easy, living is harder.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We all should hate Neil together.

They slowly walked to the front door. And Billy came inside. Silence. And then he heard sobbing in the kitchen. Susan was sobbing.   
One part of his mind told him to go to his room, hide, run as far as he could, but the other knew what might happen if he won't go there. So he quickly headed towards the noise. Susan was sitting on a chair in the kitchen, tears falling down her cheeks. Max appeared behind him, and that's when Susan seemed to saw them.   
-"O my God, mom..."-Max's voice sounded weak, she was scared. She walked to Susan and hugged her.  
Billy was just staring at them, feeling like a stranger. She was not his mother, and he couldn't go and hug her like that even though he wanted to.  
-"What happened?"-He asked after a moment of just staring at this painful act of tenderness.   
-"I-I'm sorry, Billy. I thought he knew, and I told him."  
-"Susan. You told him what?"-He hissed through clenched teeth.  
But instead of answering, Susan's eyes opened wide. And Billy felt a hit on his back. It was strong enough to make him gasp for air.  
-"She told me you're not home."-He heard Neil mumbling behind him. He must have gotten drunk. Billy couldn't even say anything back because Neil punched him straight in the face and his nose made a cracking noise. Billy yelled because of the pain, which was a huge mistake because it just resolved in getting one more punch. He felt something wet and warm dropping on his hands. Some of the blood from his nose went to his throat, which made him cough. And his lungs couldn't stop aching. He heard Neil laughing and then Billy felt a hand on his neck.   
-"Stop it, you fucking pussy. You....you need to be a man! "-His father was holding his grasp tightly around his neck. And was shouting, his face too close to Billy's. But Billy just couldn't stop coughing. He could hear that Max was crying, but he couldn't really understand the words. Then there came another punch, this time, to his stomach.  
-"Dad, please..."-he cried. He couldn't take it anymore. It hurt so much, and it was so hard to breathe. His lungs didn't want to cooperate with him.   
-"Don't call me a dad, you pussy. And stop fucking coughing!"-He was shouting. He was kicking, and Billy was hurting.   
-"I'm sorry, Sir,,...I-I-I can't"-He couldn't breathe. Dark spots started to appear in his vision. One more punch. And everything went dark.

Billy used to wonder a lot about death. When his mom left, all he could think about was not existing. Later he realized that the only way to do so was dying. When Susan and Max came to his life, he knew that his death would be the best that could happen to them. He was thinking about doing it a lot, but he never had strength for that. Who would have guessed that his wish will come true when he finally met someone he cared about. Who would have thought that the one to kill him will be Neil?   
He felt something cold on his forehead.   
-"You're okay."-Steve said. So Billy must have gotten to heaven, right? But aren't there supposed to be only dead people here? Last time Billy checked Steve was okay. But who knows? Last time Steve checked Billy was safe and sound too.  
-"Whaa..?"-Billy tried talking, but it ended up in coughing. And his everything was hurting.  
-"Oh, Billy. You're awake."-A familiar red hair appeared in front of him. Her cheeks were wet, and her eyes red and swollen.   
-"Yeah, shitbird"-Billy croaked. She chuckled and hugged him. That was weird and unexpected but nice. So nice that if he had enough strength, he would have hugged her back.  
-"Fuck, what happened?"-He said after a moment. His vision became vivid again, and he realized he was back at Harrington's place.  
The other two looked at each other before speaking.  
-"Neil got drunk"-Max said, looking at the ground. Her feature turned sad, and her eyes glassy.   
-"I called Steve with walkie because I thought, I thought you were dead"-And she burst into tears.  
Billy sat up, which caused a little bit of dizziness, but Max came to him really quickly and hugged him again. And this little shit made it worth it.  
-"I'm fine, dipshit."-He said quietly. It all seemed unreal to him. Max was hugging him, and Steve was standing next to them, and he liked Billy back. And it was so so fucking much to handle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it took me so long to update. I will post more frequently now. Hope you'll enjoy it!

**Author's Note:**

> I really do appreciate comments. I want to know what you think about it and what would you like to read next!


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